Have you ever thought to yourself, "Self, I need a funny Valentine's Day greeting card that will cheerfully infuriate my beloved, preferably with music that loops non-stop, gets louder when you press the play button again, and has glitter inside that makes a mess when it's broken."



Well, you can fulfill your oddly specific criteria by ordering the funny Valentine's Day greeting card by Joker Greeting! This card already has everything you want plus you can personalize it with your own greeting. And because our mama raised us to be kind and generous, we're helping you out by posting the Top 10 Things To Write in a Valentine's Day Card. Now you can butter up your beau before you peeve them off with a card that won't stop singing.

Top Ten Funny Things to Write in a Valetine's Day Card

  1. Because Option B means living alone with a bunch of cats.

  2. I promise to keep acknowledging you in public.

  3. This music won't stop playing. Now you know what nagging feels like.

  4. You're still mostly cute when you have bad hair days.

  5. Don't even think of starting a fight over this card because you know I'll win.

  6. It was either this card or matching sweaters.

  7. I got this card for you. No need to call me a hero.

  8. Sometimes we hold hands right after I scratch my nether regions.

  9. I love you so much, I sniff your hair while you sleep.

  10. I got off the couch to buy you this card (just kidding, I ordered it on the Internet).

Have a great Valentine's Day and try and take it a bit less serious this year. 


Joker Greeting

Gift. Laugh. Joke. 


Good one's that didn't quite make the cut...

  • You make my dreams come true. Mostly the smelly, unkempt ones.

  • I love you with every piece of my heart that hasn't withered and died.

  • I miss you when you're gone like I miss solitude when you're here.

  • You're everything I ever wanted to settle for.


Written by Travis Peterson

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